One of my very dear friends wrote me the other day, after I mentioned on a post that I was sorry about not returning the favor of your lovely comments right away and that I was sorry.
She thought that maybe all of you would be fine with it and they probably would rather have me post more, but as I told her...
I'm not okay with it.
I completely understand what she's saying and she's probably right, but...
Here's the shorter version of what I wrote to her:
The truth is, I'd love to post more, but I feel guilty when I can't get back to everyone. I feel that if someone leaves a comment, that they deserve a return visit on their blog or a comment back if they don't have one. I suppose that it stems from the old days when it was a smaller community and when someone didn't comment back to me, I felt they were rude. Honestly I still do. I even go so far as to read every post I missed since I last visited. That's the OCD in me, but also the need to let someone know I care about their life. So many of them are faithful visitors and feel as though they have a connection to me that I can't let them down or feel left out.
I know what it's like to be the one left out as a child and I know what it's like to be the new kid. I also know what it's like to leave a comment on a blog, when I didn't have one... scared to death! lol But these people comment anyway and they deserve something from me, even if it's just a thank you.
You see, back in the olden days of blogging, before it was this big giant place on the internets, it was a small group of ladies (very few men) that commented on each other's blogs.
It wasn't just a community.
It was a family.
We shared our homes.
And everyone commented back and forth.
Kinda like Facebook, without the angry weird stuff, and so much more.
After awhile, new people came around and started blogs that were meant to promote themselves and they didn't comment back when you commented.
People were shocked and felt shunned.
Who were these new bloggers?
Why do they think they're better than us?
The truth is, it just progressed and moved on to something much bigger than we ever thought it would be.
It's turned into a live magazine, a fashion show, a contest to see who has the biggest advertisers, and who can remodel their house faster with the latest trends.
And like I've said, I have no problem with any of that.
It's just not as personal anymore.
And although I miss the way it was, and although I'm a gal who loves the past and tries hard to embrace it as best I can, I know that life moves forward.
But here in my little place on the internets, I try very hard to make sure I make everyone that visits feels welcome.
I can't help it.
It's kind of like writing a thank you note and sending it in the mail.
Remember doing that?
I still do it, but that's beside the point ;)
Basically, it's called manners and even if it means posting less, I'm going to do my best to get to everyone eventually, even if it's only one time and even if they never come back.
Because to me it makes it more personal.
And as Meg Ryan once said, in a little movie called You've Got Mail...
"What's so wrong with being personal anyway?"